Category Archives: Self Love/Recovery

Cait Plus Rach in Newport – Part 2

Before reading this final post about my first two posts on my long weekend in Rhode Island, you can read the first two posts – about an afternoon in Providence and our first few restaurant stops in Newport – if you missed them!

Saturday Afternoon

After being sufficiently wined at Newport Vineyards, Rachel and I made our way back to Downtown Newport to try a new (only a few months old) spot we’d both eyed the night before – Midtown Oyster BarThe main allure came from the rooftop dining options, but the inside of the restaurant, with its multiple levels and huge open spaces, was gorgeous as well.

View from our seat!

View from our table!

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My Very Own Burger

I used to take issue with Plan B Burger Bar‘s menu and its lack of good veggie sides or interesting and healthy entrees/burgers. Over this past year as I have made progress in my recovery (though it’s definitely still in progress) and become more open to ordering a bit more “adventurously” at restaurants, I’ve come to realize that the restaurant is actually very good at what it sets out to do – make great burgers, offer delicious beer, and serve tasty bourbon. Plan B is a burger bar and a burger bar does not put focus on vegetable sides – no matter how much I might want them to, it just doesn’t fit their image. I’ve also started noticing that Plan B’s burger specials are very fit for a foodie – I have sampled both the PB&J Burger and the Georgia Peach Burger over the last several months and felt that both were life-changing!

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‘Toga! ‘Toga!

The second portion of my epic weekend began Saturday morning; I woke up in Kat‘s guest bedroom (I stayed over after Friday night’s concert since she lives in that area), got decked out, and hit the road with her, her husband Mike, and baby Penelope. Our destination? The race track in Saratoga…my first time there!

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Kat, Penelope, and I donned our preppiest dresses! Kat and Penelope both wore Lilly Pulitzer, because mommy and daughter simply MUST match. I wore my nicest dress, by Vineyard Vines…the one I tricked my dad into buying me since it’s Tennessee Vol orange and white 😛

And this time, Penelope did not poop on her Lilly ensemble!

And this time, Penelope did not poop on her Lilly ensemble!

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Proving Myself to…Myself

I sure hope someone catches the “Austin Powers” reference in the title…

I have the best readers in the world – thanks for your comments on yesterday’s post! I was already feeling a lot better when I published it Monday morning but I still had lingering feelings of regret that were holding on tightly. Like I wrote yesterday, time has been a huge part of making me feel better but your kind words help too. The way I spent my Saturday and Sunday evenings, post-Friday-evening-debacle, also gave myself the PROOF my mind needed to see that drinking all the drinks and spending all the dollars (I hope you caught that Alex) will not become habit and is not something I’ll keep wanting to do.

Saturday Night at Krust

Friends are the best medicine!

Friends are the best medicine!

Saturday night I had plans to attend the birthday dinner of Kelly‘s hubby Nick. I’d recommended to them one of my fave restaurants around, Krust Pizza Bar in Middletown. I have to be honest…I considered cancelling. I wanted to sit in my house and eat a salad and drink water, to punish myself for overdoing it on the alcohol the previous night. But I also knew that surrounding myself with loved ones and being a part of celebrating Nick’s special day would mean a lot to both me AND Kelly and Nick. Plus, staying in would have been letting the regret win. So I showered, put on a cute outfit, and headed out!

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R and R: Rest and Regret

I loved reading the comments on Friday’s post about Instagram media literacy! I figured many of you would be able to relate and I will be replying to the comments and continuing the discussion as soon as I can.

Major thanks again to everyone who was so supportive of my planned rest day this past Friday, from those who had tweets waiting for me before I even woke up, to those who checked in the day after. Whenever I wasn’t THINKING about not waking up to work out before or not driving to the gym after work, I felt okay. In fact (I will never not ask you guys to support me so please don’t take this the wrong way), sometimes I’d be good and not thinking about missing a workout and then I’d get a tweet or text asking me how the rest day was going, which unfortunately reminded me that I was taking one and made me feel guilty again. Catch-22!

UConn reunion: Ravi, Kelly, me, and Jeff.

UConn reunion: Ravi, Kelly, me, and Jeff.

My co-worker convinced me to pop into a Friday happy hour at a dive bar down the street from the office, because I always miss co-worker gatherings since I hit the gym after work. I figured since I wasn’t going to the gym that day, I should take advantage and stop by before I went to meet my college friends (above) for dinner and a night out. Ravi and Kelly were visiting from Long Island and Redding, CT (respectively) so that’s why I felt missing the gym and spending more time with them was important.

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Insta-Media Literacy

I want to start today’s post by wishing the happiest of happy birthdays to my dear blend Maria! I’m so thankful to have met you through blogging and cannot wait to see you in August!

Drinks at 116 Crown!

Drinks at 116 Crown!

I also have to say THANK YOU to everyone for your supportive tweets and comments regarding the rest day I’m taking today. I woke up this morning with such an urge to fit in a workout before work but your words seriously stopped me and reminded me of the commitment I made in yesterday’s post. I need to do this to prove to myself mentally that nothing bad will happen because of this rest day and I won’t become permanently lazy. That’s just as important as giving my body this physical rest.

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Three Things Thursday: A Discount, A Campaign, A Leap

Happy almost-Friday, folks. Our database and email network are both down at work today so you are definitely hearing from me. I have a few little things to talk about so I figured a fun, random post was in order.

1. Kona Kase Discount Code

I just received the July Kona Kase to review and will be sharing that eventually. I already received and reviewed the June Kase…you may recall I felt it contained more products for endurance athletes than I need (aka I need none) so I am looking forward to finding out what’s in the July box and seeing if the products are more “me”! I’m not withholding that information from you on purpose…I truly don’t know because I haven’t opened it yet. While you’re waiting for my review though, you can look at my June review and use a new discount code “GIFTSUMMER” to get $5 off your first Kase. That means $10 to try Kona Kase, which I think is a good deal given how much the products inside would probably cost separately.

2. Heather Waxman’s Kickstarter Campaign

Heather is taking a huge leap and pursuing her dream of combining her vocal talent with her desire to spread the word about the benefits of meditation. She’s started a Kickstarter campaign and needs $3,500.00 of funding by August 8 in order to create and distribute her very first meditation album, “Soul Sessions”. It will be available via digital download as well as CD, and backers can get their own copies (and more) as a thank you for donating. Even if you can only donate $5 it will help, so please take a moment to check out the video about her campaign and back it if you support it!

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MIMM (Heavy on the Friday)

The winner of the Talcott Mountain Music Festival ticket giveaway winner is Tiffany! Your tickets are in the mail 🙂 Thank you to all who entered and remember that you can still purchase tickets to the next two shows here!

Happy Marvelous In My Monday! Last night I was COMPLETELY wiped from a weekend of fun…and still felt wiped this morning (hello, Monday). I had one night of not enough sleep (Friday) and one good night’s sleep (Saturday), but that good night was not enough to make up for Friday. Friday was definitely the most energy-exerting, fun, friend-filled, delicious part of my weekend. The rest was great too, but you will find today’s MIMM post heavy on the Friday.

Thanks Katie for the marvelous mindset!

Marvelous is…a chef’s tasting at Pond House GrilleMy good friend Jill and I had the privilege of experiencing a tasting of small plates, prepared for us by Executive Chef Jordan Stein, for dinner on Friday night. We also sipped on some magnificently crafted cocktails and experienced a floral course, involving dry ice! I will be doing a full blog post this week about the experience so stay tuned. For now I’ll be a tease (though some of you may have gotten a sneak peek of more photos on Instagram).

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Leaving Behind An Empty Life

On Sunday morning I opened an email from a fellow blogger, sent to me in response to this post. It contained a sentence that really stood out to me, and also inspired me to write this post, which has been brewing in some form or another in my head for the last few weeks. The sentence was: “… I realized that the weight I had previously been was in no way sustainable unless I lived a life that was isolating and inherently quite empty.”

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That photo of me was taken in August 2010, soon before I sought help for an eating disorder. 100% honesty – I love how I look in that picture. I felt confident that day. I felt attractive. But do you know what else I felt? Hungry. I remember I packed a wrap for lunch (I’d skipped breakfast) using a 90-calorie FlatOut wrap. After I finished it, I barely felt a dent in my hunger, but I didn’t eat again until dinner. I’d skipped breakfast and worked out that morning. While my friends bought ice creams at the beach, I tried not to watch them enjoying their summer treats. I tried to give myself props and tell myself it was all worth it.

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My Latest Fear

Thanks for your comments on my four Glassses.com frame options, which I shared in the most recent Fashion Friday post. I will let you all know once my new glasses arrived which option I went with!

My cranky-pants are on in full force this morning. I should probably write a Marvelous In My Monday post to cheer myself up, but I didn’t have time yesterday to get all my weekend photos transferred to WordPress and I also just don’t feel like it. I just need to rant/vant/etc.

I had a very fun last few days full of special moments with the family and friends I am lucky to have in my life. Okay, I’ve acknowledged that I’m extremely fortunate. I know that. But as I’ve mentioned before, the more I enjoy, the more afraid I get that I am going to gain weight and look awful. I’ve tried talking myself through these moments of fear and fighting the irrational thoughts with those based in self-love. I’ve gotten to a point where though I may still be tempted by my ED and restriction, I am able to make healthier choices that nourish me both mentally and physically in a way that no choices I made during the worst of my ED ever could have.

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