Category Archives: About Me

Fall TV: What I’ll Be Watching

I sat down to write this post yesterday afternoon (while chatting with Annie at Refuge Cafe!) and had no idea what to write…I just know I wanted to get a post drafted because I have a buuuuusy week ahead. I know there’s always Marvelous In My Monday but to be honest, I didn’t feel that marvelous this weekend and I don’t feel like using a post to convince myself why I should feel marvelous. Just not feelin’ that right now.

So instead I’m going to feed off my current excitement over the shows I caught up with over the weekend, and share what’s on my fall TV schedule. Most are shows I’ve been watching since they premiered, but there is one newbie that hooked me from episode one (and from what I hear, some of you guys too). And let’s use the term “schedule” very loosely, because I don’t watch ANY of these shows when they are scheduled to air. Thank goodness for On Demand – no DVR required!

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New Life, New Goals

Hey guys! I continue to be extremely busy but am trying to find time to blog where I can. The good news is my cold is already almost gone and I hope it won’t turn into a month-long cough, which is how most of my colds end up. Now I haven’t done a check-in for awhile now on the goals that I set for myself back in January (also, searching for that post made me realize I’ve made a lot of goal-related posts, but am bad about following up on them). I’ve been having a stressful week so far, putting a lot of pressure on myself, doing a lot of future-tripping, and not getting enough sleep (not on purpose). So I think it’s time to re-visit the goals I need to focus on because to be honest, some have changed due to my recent move/job change, some are still out there, and some can take a back-seat for now.

1. My New Year’s ResolutionI’m still keeping this one and have definitely been slacking on it lately. Up until this past Sunday’s event my nails had been bare for a couple of weeks, I’d been wearing lots of sweatpants (actually the same pair, over and over…), and not making much effort to look very human. And it totally had an effect on my mood and body image. I’ve been spending time feeling bad about myself and not doing anything about it. It’s time to change that. My practically non-existent commute means I have plenty of time to get ready in the morning. Just because I’m going out for a quick walking errand doesn’t mean I can’t try to look semi-presentable. I will never ban sweatpants and Uggs completely, but they need to see less use!

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That Augustana Song

You know the song I’m talking about…

 

I’ve been being all mysterious about my future, a waiting game, etc. Well I’m happy to report that today I can finally spill to you guys. While the job I held for 2 years and 7 months has been good to me, and while I have learned a lot there, it has not fulfilled my passions. I think it’s easy to see what those are. Food, restaurants, wine, cocktails, fitness, marketing, social media, all things digital. That’s why I’ve been on the hunt since this past May for a job that is more me, in an industry in which I could truly see myself building a career.

Thanks to a connection and this blog (I started this blog partially to serve as a walking/talking resume, and it has done just that for me), I can announce today that I have put in my two weeks notice with my current employer. I’m going to be starting a new job in digital marketing in the wine industry and am moving away from Connecticut…to work in Boston.

Don't mind the blatantly fake Chanel.

Please disregard the blatantly fake Chanel.

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Weightless Goals

Thanks so much for your words of support in response to yesterday’s post. Every comment, email, tweet, etc was read and appreciated. No matter how crappy I may feel about myself during my recovery, there are plenty of experiences in my now-fuller life that make this process and journey worth it. I may be tricked at the moment into thinking deprivation was worth the body I was happier with, but I wasn’t even satisfied with myself back then. And you will be happy to hear that this morning, I got rid of that shirt on Saturday night that caused me tears over it being too small. It may only be one article of clothing, but it’s a start. Enough of that for now, because I’m honestly a bit sick of thinking about weight and body image and pants and all that crap. That’s why when yesterday I stumbled upon a Mind Body Green article titled 10 Awesome Life Changes That Have Nothing To Do With Losing Weight, I was completely inspired to write goal-related post as if I don’t have any issues with my appearance, any anxiety about what I ate/am going to eat, or any guilt about “only” doing 20 minutes of cardio yesterday. No body-related ambitions, no diet-related wishes, no promises to cut out X or work out more. Let’s talk about something else for once! Appreciate More: I tend to focus on shortcomings and get lost in negativity. I sometimes kinda-sorta-definitely hate those people who wake up each morning saying “Man it’s great to be alive!” but at the same time while I’m feeling like Miss Grumpy Pants over their happiness, they are, well, being happy. The phrase “fake it til you make it” keeps coming to mind. For example, if I wake up on a Monday and don’t want to go to work, I can continue to work on reminding myself to appreciate the fact that I even HAVE a job. Plenty of folks out there would kill for my job even if I don’t always enjoy it. Eventually if I keep repeating that to myself (the fake it) then I think I’ll start to believe it (the make it).

This is also where my New Year’s resolution comes in. I may not be psyched about going to work, but I can try to improve my mood by setting aside time the night before to pick out a cute outfit.

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25 Things From 19 Year Old Me

I was perusing Facebook yesterday and stumbled upon one of those “Notes”  (a feature that kinda seemed to die out…maybe FB was trying to become more blog-esque?) that you could publish publicly. I wrote it in response to a 25-things survey that was going around. The best part is I wrote this on 2/19/09…AKA I was nineteen years old.

I suppose some things do not change.

I suppose some things do not change.

There’s no way I cannot a) share it with you all and b) comment (in italics) on each item in the list. It’s pretty interesting to see where I am now versus almost FIVE years later! Also, please note the lack of capitalization and constant use of abbrevs. I’m leaving all that in the list; gotta publish it exactly as I wrote it in February 2009!

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Food Events of 2013

Let’s continue with those 2013 posts, folks. I’ve only got about another week to do so before it becomes socially unacceptable. Last month I noticed a fun Buzzfeed list: The 25 Most Important Things That Happened In 2013 For Food Lovers. I figured I’d comment on some that stood out to this particular food lover.

“19. All of the buns. Bun everything.”

I’m not a huge bun fan because they are…too huge. At least I often find they are, in comparison to the amount of meat/etc in between them. Almost every time I order a burger, I wish it had a thinner bun. Can a flatbread burger joint please open up?! But I’ll put up with a thick bun if it’s unique. Glazed donut bun? I’m intrigued. Pretzel bun? Yum! By the way, shoutout to Ruby Tuesday’s for their ridiculous pretzel bun marketing campaign in which they asked people to use the hashtag #FunBetweenTheBuns.

buns

“18. Maker’s Mark announced a plan to lower the alcohol content of their bourbon. America didn’t let it happen.”

Um, obviously not. This is also the year of Maker’s 46. Ok, so it came out in 2010. But this is the year I discovered it, and I freaking love that stuff.

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Best of Each Month in 2013

Thanks for your feedback on yesterday’s post about my 2014 New Year’s resolution! I was hesitant to hit publish because I felt there were a few misconceptions you guys could get from the post. I do not think I’m ugly without makeup or my hair “done up”, and I also didn’t want anyone to think my resolution was vain. But this is my blog and it’s my resolution so I shared, and I’m glad I did. It seems that those who commented get that it’s about how I feel about myself, not how I look to others.

I have been debating for a few weeks now how I would recap 2013 on the blog. Last year I did a top 12 of 2012 but I really think it would be too hard to rank all the great stuff I got to do and the fabulous people I got to see this year. There is so much to look at in the year! So I decided to refine a bit and instead look at each month. I’m going to try my hardest to declare a favorite day/event/occurrence/etc for each and I’ll end up with a list of twelve things, but to be honest I still won’t do an accurate enough job of getting across how grateful I am for each and every person, place, or thing (noun?!) that made 2013 a year to remember.

January

The Mohegan Sun WineFest was a very special event for me! It was my second time there to help Mohegan promote the festival but this year I got to bring my foodie partner in crime Rachel. She got hooked and is taking her boyfriend back to this year’s event! I also met Kaitlin in person for the first time, and we shared a hug that made her boyfriend (now fiance!) think that we had known each other for year’s. It sure feels like it!

Me, Rachel, and our media passes!

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My 2014 New Year’s Resolution

After you read this post I must insist you go read this funny one from Kaitlin! I am definitely guilty of several things on the list but am also with her on many of them. If the world made a resolution against progress pics and ab Instagrams, I’d be the top supporter!

I don’t usually even make New Year’s resolutions but I just happened to feel inspired to make this one around 12/31, so I’m going to call it a New Year’s resolution. My dad got very upset at first when he heard what my resolution was but hear me out: I want to make more of an effort when it comes to my appearance. Let me explain.

I’m not talking about working out more, eating “cleaner”, etc. I’m talking about blow-drying my hair, putting on eyeliner, and dressing nicely. You may remember my reflections about how much better I felt on a very mentally blah day in Florida – the day I arrived there. I felt tired and large and let my mental blahs translate into feeling like I looked blah – and should stay that way. But if feeling mentally blah makes me think I look blah, why can’t looking awesome make me feel mentally awesome? Why can’t it go both ways? It can!

Before a night out in Florida – I took the time to blow dry my hair and my sis curled it for me!

I encounter plenty of days when I want to wear my glasses, put my hair in a messy bun, and rock yoga pants. Sometimes doing so makes me feel cozy, especially post-gym on the weekend. But other times when I haven’t worked out or when I’m feeling guilty about a previous night out at an event or restaurant, I’m tempted to just retreat into myself and hide in stretchy pants. I don’t feel like trying to make myself look nice because I feel as if I don’t deserve to look nice.

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My Scale Story

I’ve been MIA because I just haven’t felt like blogging much while on vacation in Florida…but I head back to CT today. While I have some things to say/share about my trip, I’m about to head to the airport and don’t have time to write a post today. So here’s a post I wrote on the plane ride down here…

I’ve been meaning to write a post about my scale journey for awhile now, and recently Sarah did one discussing her current relationship with the scale. I wrote a novel comment in response (check out the rest of them…great discussions on this post!) That really made me realize I need to get on writing my post. So here I am, ready to share with you all my relationship with the scale from start to finish…and also what I think it would be like if the scale and I were friends (or frenemies) today.

My first scale wasn’t even mine…it was my junior year roomie’s. But that also happened to be the year I decided to change the way I ate and “tone up”, so it was convenient for me to have a roomie who was also into the same goals. I had a number in my head that I wanted to hit, and quickly it became easy for me to use the number the scale showed me to discount any hard work I’d done at the gym or any healthy meals I’d eaten that day. I could feel excellent about my healthy habits, step on the scale and see a “bad number”, and suddenly all I was thinking about was what I could have done differently to make the number go down.

Start of my junior year, ready to tone up...did I really need to?

Start of my junior year, ready to tone up…did I really need to?

Eventually I got to the point where I was stepping on the scale more than five times a day. I’d use it to purposefully feel bad about myself; stepping on the morning after a night of drinking was my way of punishing myself for the night before. Even right after I’d eaten dinner, I’d step on just because I knew the number would look higher and I’d feel shame. I wanted to associate eating with shame, so that it’d become easier to resist the urge to eat. And not just eat unhealthy food…I mean resist eating in general.

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Positive Thoughts: Cold Weather

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Most people who know me at all (not even well) know I hate cold weather. I don’t make any secret of it. When I moved here (from Florida) in 7th grade, I was so excited to experience fall and winter. And I still really enjoy fall. But as the years have passed I’ve come to the point where I can’t stand cold, I can’t stand snow and how it’s always ruining my plans (yes I’m a control freak), and I can’t stand the dark days of winter.

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Linz wrote a post yesterday called “What I Love About Cold Weather” and as soon as I read the title, my eyes rolled. I try to ignore those happy go lucky winter lovers (just being honest) because sometimes I just want to bitch and moan about the cold. Don’t get me started on the excited Facebook updates that seem to flood my feed when we get our first real snow. But then I read these words in her post: “And truthfully, I don’t love cold weather at all.  But instead of focusing on the negative, I’m going to make a list of what I love about cold weather!”

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